How to be confident in the world around YOU

Gaining and maintaining confidence is a difficult task to do. We often ask ourselves questions that undermine our abilities.

Am I making the right choice in selecting the optional questions in my exams?
Am I good enough to get a job?

Am I choosing the right time to get married?

We have many such doubts and questions which weaken our confidence.

Don’t worry confidence or self – reliance is one’s ability to have that faith in themselves and their strength to succeed.
Yes, we feel confident about our capabilities we are good at. But, confidence is more about you and how you feel about yourself. Trust yourself.

When we see confident people around us, we wonder if they get confidence and courage naturally or do they learn to develop them? For some, their cool attitude and confidence of assurance seem to come naturally. For others, it’s something that needs to be worked at and developed.

Confidence isn’t a matter of genetic programming. We can change the way we feel about ourselves and our ability to succeed. Confidence and morale can be learned – they can be cultivated, nurtured and developed. There’s really no limit to how confident one can learn to become, though overconfidence is not an appealing trait.

What is confidence for you? What does it look or feel like? Do you feel confident when you put on a certain dress or pair of shoes? Do you feel confident when you’re in the middle of a specific activity?

What makes you feel good about yourself? Find the things or times in your life that stand out to you as high points – when you felt calm, cool and in control.
Here are a few ways in which you can increase faith in yourself.

Talk to yourself in the mirror
This exercise helps increase confidence. Stand in front of the mirror, look at yourself, fix your body posture and speak. Also, use self-esteem affirmations to increase progress. Talk to people around you- Socializing helps in improving our communication skills and reducing insecurities and anxieties.

Pick up hobbies
Keep your mind and body occupied by reading watching, exercising, meditating, playing sports, writing, etc. Keep your energy high and reward your efforts, thus increasing your self-appreciation.

Face your fears
Practice doing things that make you nervous or scare you. Starting with small things for small amounts of time, build up your immunity towards things that hold you back. This will also help desensitize you to rejection and failure, and prevent you from getting bogged down by your fears.

Be patient with yourself
As Romanian tennis player Ilie Nastase said, ‘If you have confidence you have patience. Confidence, that is everything.’

Groom yourself
Grooming is an instant refresher. When we look and feel our best, we naturally become more self-confident.

Help others
Doing something for someone else lets you know that you are a good person and increases your morale.

Keep a confidence journal
Write down five things you feel confident about and focus on them. If you do this on a daily basis, it will change the way you think and feel. The best time to write a journal is just before bed because the gratitude and positivity will flow into your subconscious as you sleep. Not only will you awaken a bit more confident, but you will also be happier.

Listen to your inner guidance
It is believed that it is important to learn from your inner wisdom, as it will guide you to great success and happiness in life. Believe in your inherent wisdom and follow it.

Never let negative things or criticisms challenge your confidence
Handle criticism in a positive way and don’t let things hurt you. Finding ways to give yourself a little boost when you’re not feeling at the top of your game is a trick that truly confident people use on a regular basis.

It is highly important to conquer fear and not let it fester in our minds. As the iconic character of Yoda from the Star Wars film series said, ‘Fear is the path to the dark side. Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to suffering.’

Yoda Image 3

Each of us has a negative commentator in our heads – that nagging little voice that criticizes us. When we stumble, fall or make a mistake, that voice is there making nasty, feel-bad comments. It’s running negative scripts that destroy our self-esteem. We really can be our own worst enemy. Learn to identify the negative thoughts in your mind and challenge them, dare them. Is what you just told yourself really true? Probably not.
Identify that self-criticizing little voice in your head and confront it. You’ll be surprised by just how little it can get away with when you’re prepared to challenge it at every turn.
Don’t let shyness take away your golden opportunities. It’s important to have a healthy dose of self-confidence that helps you perform at your peak. Remember, confidence is built up and acquired over time.

If you want to be successful in life you need to be confident – with yourself, your abilities and your attitude.


Yamini Kaushik – an avid learner, reader and movie binge-watcher.

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